Unfortunately, I see this far too often. Your husband is angry because you left him or will not take him back. He will tell you that you are hurting your children or you only left him because you’re interested in someone else. Instead of trying to figure out what he did to contribute to the breakdown of your marriage, your ex is going to make you pay emotionally for leaving him by sending you mean, insulting messages.

Your ex is not allowed to verbally abuse you either through text messages, phone messages, e-mail messages or any other type of communicating. However, that does not mean you are permitted to respond in kind.

Do Not Respond
My advice to you is do not respond. No matter how upset you may be, take a breadth, and try to calm down. Do not respond. That’ll only make it worse for you when you head into court and try to say it was his entire fault. You do not want to feed the fire by shooting back the first mean thing that comes to your mind. It is much easier to have the court stop abusive messages if you are not to blame. Laugh at him for his stupidity.

Have your lawyer handle your husband
Contact your lawyer, or talk to a lawyer, and have them deal with this problem. You have every right to live your life free of your ex’s verbal abuse.

And, very importantly, call the police if you ever feel your safety is in danger.

Paul Nathan
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Marin County California Divorce, Child Support and Custody Lawyer Representing Women Exclusively